Post by Catalin on Dec 20, 2006 13:43:27 GMT -5
Authers note:It's back. ;D The first few chapters are the same but the third isn't going to be. So if you've read this before you don't have to read the first or second chapter
It was just an ordinary day of pain and suffering for me. I wish someone would help me, but I won’t dare tell anyone about what’s going on…besides her. I can’t even say her name, she’s just too good for me, and I don’t deserve to say her name. There she is again; she just got out of gym, her long brown hair up in a ponytail and her skin glistening from sweat. She’s beautiful.
“What up g?” She asked me, while crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back, like a gangster.
“You are so weird.” I laughed; she smiled and laughed also, music to my ears.
“Okay, fine. What’s up dude?” She asked.
“The usual.” I answered.
“You need to tell someone. I’m really worried about you.” No don’t say that! You don’t care about me- please don’t say that. “Please Hay?” she pouted, she is so cute when she pouts.
“Come on. You know just as well as the next person that if I tell, I’ll get thrown away, no one will care, and they don’t want to deal with me- the stupid, freakish, Goth.” I sighed, she was so stubborn.
“You’re not some stupid, freakish, Goth. No one would throw you away; you need help, just tell someone.”
“I’ll get locked up and you won’t ever see me again. Is that what you want?”
“No, but I want you to get better. It’s no use keeping you here, you need help. This place isn’t going to give you any.”
“I don’t need help. I’m fine.”
“You call those crimson marks on your arm fine?” She asked, tears filling her eyes. No don’t cry! You’re not supposed to care! You don’t care about me- please don’t cry!
“I don’t do it, you know that.”
“You don’t? Then why are there new ones every time I look? Oh I forgot, it’s something inside of you that does it, you don’t have control over it. If you’d tell someone, then you’d get control.” She said through gritted teeth, tears threatening to come from her beautiful brown eyes. She turned and walked away, people looked from her to me, knowing I did something to her, she never cried, the only tears that came from those eyes, were when she was laughing so hard she would cry.
“D!” I called after her, she didn’t turn around. “Come on D!” No answer, she turned the corner.
I got glares the rest of the day, everyone saw her tear stained face, red eyes, and the people that saw her walk away told everyone that I did it. I sent her texts during class; she didn’t answer any. I tried to talk to her during lunch; she had her friends block me from her. I called her; she didn’t answer. I passed notes; she didn’t even look at them!
I walked home, and the next thing I new, I was in the bathroom; my clean arm was over the tub, my razor hanging over it, ready to make the crimson liquid run over my skin.
I new I was going to mess up, I new it! I was just too stupid to do anything about it.
Just….Too….Stupid.
Three cuts- they were deeper then most of the ones I’ve made, I felt lightheaded, more then usual. All I saw was the blood rush down my arm and I felt the pleasure. Then I passed out, in the middle of the bathroom. Now someone was definitely going to find out.
Love is War, and Our Hearts are the Battlefield
Chapter One
[/b][/center]Chapter One
It was just an ordinary day of pain and suffering for me. I wish someone would help me, but I won’t dare tell anyone about what’s going on…besides her. I can’t even say her name, she’s just too good for me, and I don’t deserve to say her name. There she is again; she just got out of gym, her long brown hair up in a ponytail and her skin glistening from sweat. She’s beautiful.
“What up g?” She asked me, while crossing her arms over her chest and leaning back, like a gangster.
“You are so weird.” I laughed; she smiled and laughed also, music to my ears.
“Okay, fine. What’s up dude?” She asked.
“The usual.” I answered.
“You need to tell someone. I’m really worried about you.” No don’t say that! You don’t care about me- please don’t say that. “Please Hay?” she pouted, she is so cute when she pouts.
“Come on. You know just as well as the next person that if I tell, I’ll get thrown away, no one will care, and they don’t want to deal with me- the stupid, freakish, Goth.” I sighed, she was so stubborn.
“You’re not some stupid, freakish, Goth. No one would throw you away; you need help, just tell someone.”
“I’ll get locked up and you won’t ever see me again. Is that what you want?”
“No, but I want you to get better. It’s no use keeping you here, you need help. This place isn’t going to give you any.”
“I don’t need help. I’m fine.”
“You call those crimson marks on your arm fine?” She asked, tears filling her eyes. No don’t cry! You’re not supposed to care! You don’t care about me- please don’t cry!
“I don’t do it, you know that.”
“You don’t? Then why are there new ones every time I look? Oh I forgot, it’s something inside of you that does it, you don’t have control over it. If you’d tell someone, then you’d get control.” She said through gritted teeth, tears threatening to come from her beautiful brown eyes. She turned and walked away, people looked from her to me, knowing I did something to her, she never cried, the only tears that came from those eyes, were when she was laughing so hard she would cry.
“D!” I called after her, she didn’t turn around. “Come on D!” No answer, she turned the corner.
I got glares the rest of the day, everyone saw her tear stained face, red eyes, and the people that saw her walk away told everyone that I did it. I sent her texts during class; she didn’t answer any. I tried to talk to her during lunch; she had her friends block me from her. I called her; she didn’t answer. I passed notes; she didn’t even look at them!
I walked home, and the next thing I new, I was in the bathroom; my clean arm was over the tub, my razor hanging over it, ready to make the crimson liquid run over my skin.
I new I was going to mess up, I new it! I was just too stupid to do anything about it.
Just….Too….Stupid.
Three cuts- they were deeper then most of the ones I’ve made, I felt lightheaded, more then usual. All I saw was the blood rush down my arm and I felt the pleasure. Then I passed out, in the middle of the bathroom. Now someone was definitely going to find out.
